Girl Talk

• Posted on April 6, 2009 at 12:01 am

I love getting together with my girlfriends, especially when there’s alcohol involved. Here’s a list of quotes from a recent get together that involved eight hours of eating, drinking, and bonding. I am not using names, not so much to protect the innocent, but because I don’t want anyone pissed at me. Enjoy!

“My pubs look like a 40 year old man’s receding hairline.” Um, I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing.

“One time, I got toe-fucked. It’s like getting fingered, but with toes.” I’m going to file this one under “THINGS I NEVER WANTED TO KNOW ABOUT MY FRIENDS.”

“I was dating a guy who told me it would be okay if I wanted to pee on him.” If I remember correctly, this was also the same guy who told her she could stick her finger up his ass if she wanted to…she didn’t.

“I think my coochie lips taste like coffee.” Okay, I twisted that one a bit. She was actually talking about her lip gloss, but the rest of us were talking about coochies and we misunderstood.

“I was going down on a guy and in the middle of it, he asked me what I was doing that weekend. Was I supposed to answer or keep going?” Hmm, that is a predicament!

“I wish this couch had a toilet in it.” Yeah, I hate getting up to pee, too.

“I just had a baby…out of my butt!” This refers to the all enjoyable morning after pooh. It’s always a whopper when you’ve been drinking beer all night, followed by ten pounds of bean dip. Yummy!

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  • Dating (The Good, The Bad & The Ugly)