An Open Letter To Taylor Swift
Dear Taylor Swift,
Let’s have a chat. You are one of the few young singers today who doesn’t make my ears explode when I hear one of your songs. You are a genuinely talented singer/songwriter/musician and on top of that, you seem like a really sweet girl. So why, why, why are you starting to hang around one of the biggest pieces of shit walking the earth right now?!
I just saw a picture of you and colossal dick worm, John Mayer, cozying up to one another the other night in Nashville. NOOOOOO! Taylor, do you not read any of his press?! He is a self-absorbed, narcissistic prick. He is TROUBLE with a capital Douche! He will take your good girl virginal ass and tear you up! By all accounts, he likes to come in through the back door and leave you with a golden shower…if you know what I mean.
SPRINT away from this dick worm as fast as you can and do not look back. Your mother should be throwing a chastity belt on your ass ASAP and taking you into the witness protection program for a while until he finds his next victim. I will be holding a candle light vigil in your honor tonight in the hopes you come out of all this still pure and unscathed.
Keep those legs crossed,
Brooke Amanda
Poor Taylor: her poor innocent self has no idea what shes in for…a candlelight vigil is definitely in order!
Jaysus! Who’s next–Kanye?
“TROUBLE with a capital Douche!” – that was seriously awesome. Surely she’s smarter than that, right? Maybe they’re working on a bluesy song together?? Hopefully???
Stephanie- We may just have to have a full out intervention!
kathcom- Oh God! Nooooo!
Foxy- I am praying they are keeping it strictly professional and not strictly dickly
I seriously can’t believe any self respecting woman would touch that giant bobble-headed rat shit loser.